Day 3 | You Want Love… But You Don’t Trust Anyone Anymore | Series: You’re Healing… But Still Stuck

We want love… real love… genuine connection. But if we are honest, something has shifted — how we trust, how we open up, how we let people in. Let’s talk about it today.

Father, search our hearts today. Show us where fear has taken the place of trust. Help us to be honest about what we are carrying and give us the grace to let You heal it. In Jesus’ name, amen.

So we were all created to be loved and to love. God, our Creator, is LOVE. 

But there’s a problem: sin entered the world, and now there’s a thing called falling out of love, there’s dislike, there’s even hatred. 

However, for those of us who still recognise the beauty of love, we still can admit we have the need for love, and for those of us who are a little scared to love and be loved because we have been burnt, this session today is for us.

For reasons we can all identify with, even though the circumstances hit differently, we shy away from genuine love because we don’t trust like we used to. Maybe because of past experiences, disappointments, or situations where we opened up, and it did not end well.

And if we are honest, it’s not that we don’t want to try again to have a connection…it’s that something we experienced changed how we see people. 

So before we go any further, let’s look at what love is supposed to look like.

1 Corinthians 13:5–7 (KJV) reminds us that love, “Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil; Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth; Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things.”

Love believes. Love hopes. Love does not constantly expect the worst. But when trust has been broken, that becomes difficult. 

For example, someone disappoints you once, and now every similar situation makes you cautious, guarded, and hesitant to fully engage.

Psalm 56:3 (KJV) says, “What time I am afraid, I will trust in thee.”

We are called on to trust God and live. 

So what we are dealing with is trust in people compounded by fear. Fear that the same thing might happen again. Fear that if we open up, we will be hurt again. Fear that what we experienced before will repeat itself.

And now, without even realising it, we have allowed that fear to take the place of trust.

Proverbs 3:5 (KJV) tells us, ‘Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.’

But the question is: what happens when our understanding has been shaped by hurt?

Family, we cannot stay there. We have to address it. Don’t withdraw. 

The first thing we do is become honest about the fear. Psalm 34:4 (KJV) says, “I sought the Lord, and he heard me, and delivered me from all my fears.” We cannot be delivered from what we will not acknowledge.

The second thing is that we need to stop allowing past experiences to define present people. 2 Corinthians 5:16 (KJV) says, “Wherefore henceforth know we no man after the flesh.” That means we don’t define people by what we see naturally or what we’ve experienced. We learn to see them through God’s perspective, not just our own.

The third thing is we learn to trust wisely, not blindly. Matthew 10:16 (KJV), “Be ye therefore wise as serpents, and harmless as doves.” God is not calling us to ignore wisdom. He wants us to be wise. God is calling us to remove fear from the driver’s seat.

Ecclesiastes 4:9–10 (KJV) reminds us, “Two are better than one; because they have a good reward for their labour. For if they fall, the one will lift up his fellow.”

Proverbs 4:23 (KJV) tells us, “Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life. Guarding your heart is wisdom. Closing your heart is fear.”

Family, what we are talking about here today is not just about romantic relationships. This includes friendships, family, ministry, and everyday connections. We were not created to do life alone.

That being said, let us also turn the mirror inward. Because there are times we have contributed to broken trust. We have withdrawn, we have miscommunicated, and there have been times when we have responded out of fear. 

Romans 3:23 (KJV) reminds us, “For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God.”

2 Timothy 1:7 (KJV) says, “For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.” So if fear is controlling how we relate, then something is out of alignment.

Psalm 147:3 (KJV) encourages us, “He healeth the broken in heart, and bindeth up their wounds.” God wants to heal the place that was broken, but we have to allow Him access to it.

So today, we do not just say we don’t trust. We ask ourselves why don’t we don’t trust anyone to be close to us anymore. And then we take that fear to God, again and again, until it no longer controls how we respond.

Because healing is not just about moving on. It is about becoming whole again.

And when God heals us, we will not just want love; we will be able to walk in it wisely, not fearfully. Amen! 

Click here for the full Live Empowerment Session: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jrq_0_K3UOk&pp=0gcJCcMKAYcqIYzv